spare me. please.
| 15:24 Sunday, March 27, 2005
the nights are lonely.
| 11:33 Thursday, March 24, 2005
remedy for painful periods and bad headaches!
| 01:19 Tuesday, March 22, 2005
spot the difference.
the older maxim shoot is on the right and the newer one is on the left.
i think eva longoria is HOT HOT HOT.
but does IT really matter?
make a difference as to how hot she really already is.
| 13:18
PEP TALK!
these past 2 weeks have been crazy.
but now its all settled.
i'm so much happier.
there's a lightness of being.
perhaps from all that lifted burden.
dont take it the wrong way please.
so yes, its time to get my life in order.
study study study.
thats the main thing thats been weighing on my mind.
so yes i screwed my O's, and also my A's.
so now i'm stuck where i dont really wanna be.
but am i going to screw this up yet again?
i say NO.
NO NO NO.
yeah right sophia, all talk and no action again eh?
always say wanna study.
but this time, its going to be different.
-punches fist into air and does the pelvic thrust-
ok u know i screwed up my O's because i was so overwhelmed by my puppy love.
i was so crazy about him.
we spent everyday together after school..
watchin him play half-life, lounging infront of his room's tv for hours on end, fiddling with his violin and basically doint NOTHING.
i screwed up my A's because i was so busy with my "i think he's the guy i might marry".
we were in town/siglap/eastcoast everyday.
eating, chillling, shopping, reading at borders, lounging in his house, watching dvds.
play play play.
him him him.
fun fun fun.
in the end.
boo-hoo-hoo.
so now.. in university..........
i'm not going to let any guy/friend/whateverthingamajig screw my exams up.
uh-uh.
ok.
so its like less than 2 months to my exams.
better start now now now. i mean NOW.
bye.
| 01:43 Monday, March 21, 2005
THIS has infuriated my wrath.
hell hath no fury like a woman SCOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORNED. (for an anon person. thankusomuch. heheh)
THIS is the bane of my existence.
i am a pleasantly easygoing person.
but i cannot tahan already.
I CAN'T FIT INTO MY WHITE SIZE 8 PAIR OF SHORTS ANYMORE.
in august last year, i was 48kilograms.
on the 21st of march 2005, i am 54kilograms.
5454545454545454.
can go buy 4d.
maybe will strike.
i will slow jog with a vengeance.
jog my way back to my previous weight.
till my leg heals.
and i stop limping retardedly and take half an hour to walk my way down a flight of stairs.
my mommy's joining pilates at amore.
so i can tag along for free to sign up for the student's package.
even she said: girl i think u quite fat. last time when mommy was your age, she was slim. very slim.
then she brandished her ultimate weapon: her wedding banquet cheongsam. yes bright red with gold trimmings. it was apparently the trend back then.
TRY IT! said she.
so i did.
i couldnt even get it pass my freaking thighs!!!!
"there told u, fat lar girl. better lose some weight. dont eat so much. all that supper. prata, meepok, laksa, sambal stingray. goes straight to your buttocks and thighs. u know u peranakan, see all your aunties, they all have big butts. because all peranakan women have big butts. u look exactly like daddy. so u got more of his peranakan genes. not careful, u become like them. not nice right? how? so u better start young. exercise. next time when u give birth, u wont balloon. pearshaped body not so appealing."
ahhhhhhhh such wise words.
yes mommy, for once i wont argue or protest.
| 23:00 Saturday, March 19, 2005
NOT FOR THE FAINT-HEARTED
my goodfriend and i always argue about 1 particular thing.
she'll always say: sophia can u stop heehaw-ing about it?! i can't help it can i?
u see, i claim she has a bladder/bowel problem.
and she DOES!
on our weekly shopping "escapades".
every single shopping mall she steps into, she has has has to visit the, in nicer terms, restroom.
be it taka, heeren, fareast, forum. everywhere and anywhere.
and she takes a helluva long time lar!
she protests to my constant complaints: this kinda thing, how u expect me to hurry? if i need to shit, i need to shit ok. if i need to pee, i have to. u cant expect me to control my pee/shit/shit&pee right?
me: but u need to go every half hour!
so we resolved it by............................
everytime she spends a damn long time in the bloody toilet.
i'll go too, and try to see if anything comes out.
it actually works but it takes forever.
the waiting and "gek-ing" isn't exactly my cup of tea.
im a speedshitter (a term coined by KSF. heheh.)
which means less than 5 mins and i'm done but the catch is when i feel the urge, i have to go straightaway, if i wait, there wont be anymore of the "ineedtoshitNOW" feeling and it'll be a long time till it comes again.
so for now, to accomodate her, "gek-ing" here i come!
| 00:40 Friday, March 11, 2005
mummy and me
my mom reads my blog.
yes, she stumbled on it.
heheheh.
she reads yours too, fen.
are u reading this mommy?
:) if u are, i love u!
| 16:58 Tuesday, March 08, 2005
nobody knows the exact thoughts that flow through your brain.
nobody will ever know if u don' tell.
the thoughts when you're walking home alone at night.
your personal thoughts regarding certain situations.
fantasies played out in your mind.
your mind is indeed your personal playground.
everybody is complicated.
you can backstab someone.
you can think evil thoughts.
you can think nice thoughts.
you can agree, disagree, debate, wonder, ponder, laugh, cry, whine.
have an imaginary friend.
play out beautiful scenes that u know will never ever in this lifetime happen.
everything will run smoothly, the way u want it to.
because its all in your head.
there won't be unhappy, unwanted interruptions or a change of plans.
its my best friend.
it keeps all the naughty nasty dirty awful secrets without breathing a word.
it will never never betray, backstab, or hate me.
and its mine mine 100% totally mine and not a single soul can steal it from me.
i feel happy just having such a thought.
ahh.. another thought.
its a wonderful place to be in.
and my friends always chide me for stoning.
now they know better.
| 22:27 Sunday, March 06, 2005
tonight i counted the stars.
and there were none.
there used to be stars,
when we stared in adoration.
there used to be stars,
grades of distinctions we gave.
there used to be stars,
at least you were one.
there used to be stars,
and they were not crossed.
look at your stars, why can't they shine for me?
----
daddy, don't go.
| 03:48 Friday, March 04, 2005
1 year ago, alevel results day.
today's the alevel results collection day.
one year on, i can still taste the fear, the palpitation, the anticipation, the relief (oh is finally over and done with)
HAHAHA.
its so so long ago.
yet it still haunts me, in some rather strange manner.
its never fun to take your results slip when u didn't study much for ur exams. heh.
| 17:22
let me rant.
about my oh-so-sweet pri.4 tuition kid.
yeah, her parents are rich-o.
i always see different convertibles/merc/bmws parked outside their large home.
i ask her: who does all these cars belong to, grace?
she says: daddy lor, uncle lor. who else? not mine what.
yeah, rich so what?!
she can't spell, add, subtract, divide, multiply!!!
SHEEEEEEEEEEET!!!
she's one helluva smart aleck when it comes to arguing.
me: ok, lets do the revision paper your teacher gave u ok?
her: no cannot, teacher say cannot dowith tuition teacher. must ownself do!
me: why?
her: so can see where our standard is what.
me: ok if i don't do it with u, will u do it on your own?
her: no u siao ah, of course wont do lar, who will want to do homework one.
her: cher, today can end 15mins early?
me: why?
her: because u came 15mins late so must punish u.
wth?!!
me: oh really? ok next week i come 15mins earlier ok? and we end 15 mins later.
her: huh why?
me: to reward me for coming early what.
her: kidding only lar. why so fierce.
her: can i go toilet?
me: NO! u've gone to the toilet for 3 times already.
her: fine lor, don't blame me if i she-she here ah.
me: then she-she here, like i care. i'm not the one CLEANING!
her: but i'm so urgent now, i cant concentrate.
-she closes her eyes, folds her arm and refuses to move-
me: fine fine go!
me: where's your science assessment book?
her: don't know.
me: tomorrow's your science ca!! where is it!
her: how to spell tomorrow?
me: T-O-M-O-R-R-O-W. where is the science assessment!!
her: can repeat, u say too fast?
me: unless u tell me where's your science assessment book first.
her: under the bed, my maid lar. always sweep things under the bed.
- so i had to push a queen sized bed out to finally find a science assessment book-
her: HAHAHA is i push it under the bed one! see u push the bed so funny!
ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH.
ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH.
KIDS! BAH!
| 16:29 Wednesday, March 02, 2005
i feel lonely.
the weeks before fen and charm left.
we had impromptu suppers.
charmimi driving us to ulu places in the middle of the night. and having trouble u-turning. heh.
lounging at someone's place doing nothing.
rouge on thursdays.
zouk on fridays.
sentosa on sundays.
bakchormee.
bloodycockles.
sambalstingray.
orhlua.
kwaychup.
fen, rem our 15bucks pot of tea at the esplanade!
it seems so quiet now.
my nights are spent reading, channel flipping, studying or at least trying to.
i miss the girls.
i really do.
10.a.m.Statistics.mock.paper.to.go.or.not.to.go.
| 02:41
